Learning from Dating

Teresa went out with Eric, a guy she met at a speed dating event.  He took her on a few dates and then invited her to his apartment.  Eric made advances on Teresa and she held her boundaries.  Eric then dumped Teresa, saying he wanted someone he could get physical with.

• A guy who wants to use you will leave.  A guy who loves you will wait for marriage.
• Your purity is worth more than some loser's approval.

Teresa went out with Araj, a guy she at a swing dancing event.  He took her to the zoo, where he did not offer to pay and proceeded to make sexual jokes.  When Teresa confronted him on this behavior, he said he wasn't looking for a relationship and just wanted to have fun.  He also admitted that he would never marry a non-Indian woman.

• No matter how great you may be, you will not be everyone's dream woman.
• Look at how much effort a man puts into a date and communicating with you.

Teresa went out with Rich, a guy she met online.  Rich was not the most chivalrous, talked repeatedly about exes, could not part with gifts from exes, lied, and proposed to Teresa with a below average ring.  Teresa declined the marriage proposal and decided to see other people who would treat her better.

• You don't have to marry the first guy who asks.  Aim for the best, not simply good enough.
• Take time to get to know someone as not all red flags show up immediately.

Teresa went out with Chris, a guy she met online.  He asked her to dinner, which was fun.  At dinner, he cursed and swore a lot.  When Teresa confronted him on this behavior, he said he wasn't ready for a relationship and was still figuring out what he wanted in life.

• Look at how much effort a man puts into a date and communicating with you.
• Don't settle for someone who makes you uncomfortable.

Teresa went out with Jack, a guy she met online.  He asked her to get coffee, which he did not even offer to pay for.  Teresa felt like the guy was not very interested in her and even asked Jack why.  Jack said that he was not ready for a relationship and was just getting practice talking to women.

• Look at how much effort a man puts into a date and communicating with you.
• Do not meet someone for coffee.  It is zero effort.

Teresa got breakfast with Alex, a guy she met online.  After the second date, which wasn't very thoughtful, he told Teresa that they weren't a good match because he wasn't ready for a relationship.  Teresa found out from facebook that Alex had recently got out of a relationship.  There were lots of pictures of Alex and his ex going to the ballet and him getting her flowers.

• All men know how to treat women well, even if they don't show it to YOU.  
• Know that some men may be on the rebound, and this has nothing to do with you.

Teresa was getting many men online "liking" her profile but not actually asking her out.  So, she decided to collect some data.  Every guy who "liked" her profile but didn't ask her out, she asked why.  Responses ranged from I'm not ready for a relationship to I'm just looking for fun.

• Look at how much effort a man puts into a date and communicating with you.
• Know that not every man who "likes" you online is relationship material.

Teresa got asked out by Chang.  Teresa said she'd go out with him if he cleaned up his language (he had a potty mouth).  Chang said he couldn't do that.  At a separate social outing, Teresa was talking to her friend Max.  Max began cursing, and she started to walk away.  Max said he'd promise not to swear if that meant Teresa would stay.  Teresa and Max are only friends but she likes his level of respect.

• If someone really likes you (even as just a friend), they will not want to make you uncomfortable.
• You don't have to tolerate bad behavior.  Walk away.

Teresa met two guys one week.  One guy said Teresa could spare to lose a few pounds, while the other guy said Teresa was too skinny.  Teresa was the same weight / same size when meeting both of those men.

• Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. 
• Aim to be your best self instead of trying to meet someone else's standard of beauty.  

Teresa met two guys one week.  One guy said Teresa was beautiful, while the other guy said he felt no chemistry.  Teresa had the same appearance when meeting both of those men.

• Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. 
• Aim to be your best self instead of trying to meet someone else's standard of beauty.